How to get older kids (ages 9 and 5) to stay in their own beds overnight?

I posted this already but wasn't detailed enough so I wanted to try again.My husband is a police officer and about 4 months ago one of his close friends was killed in the line of duty. My boys found out about it and the older one went to the funeral. It caused some anxiety in both of them about their dad dying and manifested in them coming into our room to sleep. We got them professional help and they both learned some coping mechanisms. Things were going great until a couple of weeks ago. The boys share a room by choice (we have an extra bedroom) and they usually both sneak into our room at night. The therapist recommended making up a little bed on the floor and putting it there so the kids know they have a space to go if they ever get scared in the middle of the night. That worked for a while but now the floor bed is being completely ignored and they are climbing into my bed. The other night my husband had the overnight shift so he wasn't home when the boys climbed into bed and I didn't notice them. He got home a little after 6am and was upset that the kids were in the bed. He woke me up and asked if I help get them out so he can go to sleep. When I came back to the room to get my stuff he said, "This needs to stop." I don't disagree with him. We didn't get to talk about it much because my toddler woke up for the day and I knew her brothers would shortly follow. It does need to stop but I am not sure how to do that. I have talked to them about the coping mechanism the therapist gave them but it hasn't been working.They are both normal boys otherwise. Smart, active, and good kids. They get a good amount of sleep and outdoor time. For whatever reason whenever they wake up in the middle of the night their first urge is to come to our bedroom.We have talked to them about how they need to sleep on the floor and not in the bed. Due to scheduling changes my husband has been working overnight pretty often and that's usually the nights that the boys sneak in the room. I don't hear them. I even tried putting a bell on the door but I still don't hear it. They climb into bed and are usually out of bed by the time dad gets home. It was just the other morning my husband got home at 6 instead of 7 so they were still in the bed. I don't want to be harsh and lock them out but I don't think coming into my bed multiple night is a good situation for any of us. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2ZjbepA