Hi everyone! Sorry for the formating, I'm on mobile!So, back story. I have two kids of my own. A 3 yo son (we'll call him Hayes) and a 11 month old daughter (she's not really important to this story). My kids, my husband and I are living with my mom and family, due to finances. We plan on moving out as soon as we have enough money saved up for our own home. Right now, my two cousins have been staying with us for two weeks now. The oldest is 8 years old, we'll call him Jay, and a 7 year old girl, (but she's really important but we'll call her Phoebe).For the past two weeks, my little cousins have been at our house. Jay and Phoebe are from two states over from us, about 8 hours away. They have been staying with us for two weeks now, they'll be leaving here some time next week.Since day 1, Hayes and Jay have been arguing nonstop over little things and I really don't know how to handle the situation with them. It started with my xbox, which I took away, as per my mom's word to help minimize their fighting. It helped in some sense, but not a lot. It's been almost nonstop with these two. Jay is the oldest kid in his house, and Hayes is the oldest in ours. I understand that there's going to be arguments occasionally, but it hasnt stopped since jay and Phoebe got here. I've tried to be understanding of their arguments and help them solve it to the best of my ability if they couldn't on their own. Today, I just got enough of their arguing, and told them no one was allowed to play for right now. I just couldnt take it anymore and snapped. No one got hurt, but Jay's, Hayes's, and Phoebe's feelings got hurt. I feel awful for it, and Phoebe didn't deserve to be punished for their fighting, but I couldnt listen to the fighting anymore and I told all of them to stop playing for now. I apologized a few times to Phoebe for making her stop playing as well.I've tried to explain to Jay that Hayes has a more active imagination, and doesnt mean to cause harm or "destroy" anything their playing (they play make believe minecraft a lot) and he just wants to play with the big kids and that his maturity level isnt that of Jays. I've tried to explain to Hayes that there are good ways and bad ways to play with Jay, and that he cant do the bad ways because it upsets them and makes them fight. But nothing I say or do seems to get through to either of them and I'm at an absolute loss at what to do.Any advice? I want them to be able to play together without fighting and to have a great relationship when it's time for jay and Phoebe to leave for back home.TL;DR/ my 8 year old cousin and my 3 year old son wont stop fighting and I need advice on how to handle the situation properly. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3hfCqLH
No comments:
Post a Comment