19 Year Old Trans Son, Strange Findings in His Room

Throwaway due to the nature of the topic; My 19 year old son came out to me as being transgender back when he was 17, he expressed that he feels like a girl, and expressed interest in transitioning. Being new to the lgbt stuff I did some research; I had known for some time that he kept women’s clothing hidden in his closet, some of them being mine, but I never felt it appropriate to confront him about it, and after he came out the problem of why he had women’s clothing was settled. He expressed interest in transitioning, and asked to see a doctor. Trying to be supportive, I brought him, and he’s been getting some testosterone blocking injections ever since. Things really started to change with him in college though, he became a lot moodier, distant, he was never home, and after a year he dropped out to work full time.Being a year out of college now, I’ve noticed so many changes and I’m completely unsure how to handle them; I was in his room today gathering some dishes while he was out since I was frustrated that he didn’t bring them down before leaving; It’s the first time I’ve gone into his room in years; and I noticed in the open closet lots of women’s clothing, makeup, and estrogen pills I was unaware he was taking. Curious, I looked a little further, alcohol, marijuana, a broken open women’s razor with the blades sitting on the table, and then it just gets even weirder, he has big adult size pacifiers? and what I realized where diapers, but not just plain adult diapers, they’re pink and purple and have all these childlike patterns on them, a big teddy bear on his bed, and the whole room was just so different from how I remember it being, it used to be such a boys room and now it has these christmas light looking things hanging around, candles, pictures with friends on the wall, it’s so clean, so girly, it’s surreal, but I’m just so completely flabbergasted at everything, the alcohol, the marijuana, the diapers!!!, One of the pictures with friends has him in a dress, stockings, makeup and hair done, he looks like a girl, and he’s being held and kissed by this guy who i guess is his boyfriend??? I didn’t even know he was gay, I don’t know what to make of any of this; he was my little boy, and at most he painted his nails but always dressed like a boy, but all this women’s clothing, makeup, the substances, what’s a mother to do?I have yet to confront him about this, but I feel like i’ve had my child torn away from me and replaced by a total stranger. Guidance on what the heck I should do is massively appreciated right now. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2Xu5VSn