I have an 8 year old child and have never enjoyed parenting. I count down the seconds until 18 years. I am the primary caregiver but my ex takes about 40% time. I told him during the pandemic I was really emotionally & financially struggling & considered adoption. He said that wasn’t an option, but also doesn’t pitch in past his obligations that often. I’m in therapy due to the stress and suicidal ideation. I don’t feel like rehab is warranted just yet, but I have found myself drinking a lot at night this past year just to get past the mental anguish & my parents were addicts so that’s scares me if this continues. I’ve considered reaching out to trusted family friends and saying “I need you to take this child on”, even if just for a few months to get a break. But I can’t shake the thought of adoption. I feel like soon my kid will start to realize I hate this and find me neglectful and hate me for it. I also worry the same hate will come from walking away from parenthood. I’ve met very few moms who have ever left their kids (dads get a free pass somehow?). I’ve never met an adult who said their parent didn’t raise them and wasn’t torn up about it. There seems like no good solution. Are there support groups to turn to? Encouragement only please. via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/3Ds71Ap
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