Have you ever watched your child wholeheartedly attack you? Have you ever wondered if someday they will kill you? Not metaphorically, legitimately kill you. I have.My son is 3.5 and was diagnosed autistic when he was about 2. We have been through 2 speech therapists, an occupational therapist, 2 daycares and now he is in ABA center M-F 8-3. We are currently on a hiatus with them because of Covid and had services in home for about 4 months.He is such a mixed bag as a child. The first 2 years of his life he primarily just screamed and cried 24/7. The only thing that ever made him happy was tv/movies. We had found a happy balance and he is very verbal now. He is a smart kid (can count to 50, can name damn near anything shown to him and his photographic memory is insane). But oh my god his anger issues are the stuff of legends. I have read so many times that anger isnt inherently a part of autism but my god does he lose his shit.I dont understand externally where he would have gotten it from as I can count on one maybe two hands the number of times I have genuinely yelled at him and his mother and I are not loud/angry and if we ever have a disagreement it doesn't take place in from of him.But any demand or even a positive suggestion (ie: Him: want to watch a show Me: alright bud, wanna watch Daniel Tiger or Octonauts? Him: (screaming, tears and thrashing) ICANTWATCHDANIELTIGER OR OCTONAUTS!NOOOO DADDYY!!!! Me: Thats fine, what would you like to watch? Him: NO! I DONT WANT TO WATCH A SHOW! Me: Alright, well then we can find something else to do. Him: hysterics intensifies WANT TO WATCH A SHOOOWWWWWWWWW. Me: stops responding)This comes off and on all day like the flick of a light switch. And sometimes one of these back and forths will result in him just seeing red and attacking us. Headbutts, pinching, kicking, punching. And we have tried everything from time outs (this just adds fuel to the fire, it will legitimately never end), to completely ignoring it, to stern correction. There just seems to be no getting through.But on most days he's just wearing us so fucking thin. Most nights we have 0 energy for each other in any way, sex is so far gone at this point just because we are both so sick of being touched, we pretty much eat or drink our feelings and give each other a half hearted "heres to another 12 hours of this shit tomorrow" kiss and pass the fuck out.I love my wife and I love my son. He can be a silly little kid and loves playing go fish and hide and seek (even if the concept eludes him sometimes)(ie Him: sits in middle of empty room find me dad!) But I will play along. I do my best to be there for him and to work through his struggles together. I love the little shit even when he makes me want to play in traffic.I guess I just needed to vent, we have close to 0% support system. My parents are aging and both in terrible health and her parents have 0 clue how to interact or deal with an autistic child, they try sometimes but if he gets upset or hits or god forbid has a meltdown the basically slowly walk away and go "oh my whats wrong with him" so not a lot of help there.Can anyone give me a story of a similar type situation where their ASD child was insufferable at a younger age but came into their own as they grew up?I fully understand autism and I in no way think he will "grow out of it" I accept him for who he is, but as he gets older I hope he will develop better coping mechanisms and ways to control outbursts and rage.Sorry for the rant.... via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/32uomtF
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