Unsure about kids

36 MHi parents, I'm in a tough spot.I've never wanted kids, never felt a need to have them and never really liked being around other people's kids. I don't find them cute and I'm not at all worried about "leaving a legacy" with a child. I've been happily proceeding through life under the assumption that I'll never have them.My previous relationship of 4 years ended because she decided she wanted kids and I just couldn't bring myself to be ok with having them. I went to years of therapy after this, wondering what was wrong with me. Everyone seems to think kids are super cute, and since I don't I keep feeling left out. I was very down on myself that I lost a great relationship over this personal oddity, and I challenged myself a lot to see if I could be OK with having kids. Eventually I simply allowed myself the space to say "I don't want them, and that's ok".I later met a different woman. I told her on our 3rd date that I didn't want kids at all. She said she was unsure. Fast forward 2 years and she has decided that she can no longer be with me unless I'm OK with having 1 child in the future.This woman is incredibly special and we've been living harmoniously together during COVID without issue aside from this. I've been seeing a psychologist trying to analyze my reasons for not wanting kids, but it isn't doing anything to change my mind towards them.If I agreed to have a child, it would be for her, not for any desire on my part. My concern is that everyone I've spoken with says that having children changes the relationship, the partner, and your lives rather dramatically. In other words, I'm going to lose the relationship I currently have one way or the other - we either break up, or it changes by introducing a child into the mix.I've been incredibly depressed about this whole thing. I am down on myself for being "the odd man out" who doesn't want kids amidst a world of 7 billion and counting who can't seem to stop popping them out. I am down about losing another relationship with an incredible woman, and I'm wondering if I simply submit and say "ok fine let's have a kid" and roll the dice, whether I'll be better off doing that or continuing to bounce around between relationships with women who eventually decide they would rather have a child than continue to be in any relationship which does not lead to one, as their biological clocks tick onward.I'm afraid of ending up alone over this one issue.My question to this audience is: What would you do? Do I go forward with having a child to continue being with her or end another (otherwise great) relationship to go back into the dating pool at 36 and likely repeat this whole process again? via /r/Parenting https://ift.tt/2XLQpnX